“Ne sanoo mulle,
tää on nyt sun todellisuus.
Tää on nyt sitä, tässä kaikki,
tää on lopullisuus.
Tän ulkopuolella päivät valuvat hukkaan.”
Apulanta – Aggressio
Critique never feels good. Especially nowadays when critique is so easily given, without checking the facts first. Based on a small piece of news people are judged and driven to situation that may cause troubles in following years. It’s not always about the fact that someone would want it. It’s enough to choose wrong words in wrong place and the scandal is ready.
If someone criticizes me I easily have the need to defend myself. I want to explain myself and point that the other is wrong. To prove that I have acted right and that the critique is groundless. However this is not always possible. Sometimes we just have to face critique and get over it.
Previously I reacted very negatively to critique. I thought that critique meant that I’ve failed in somethings, failed as a person. I could take the critique very personally and it was difficult to overcome. The words could hurt for a long time.
Yesterday I took part to an event where I heard a new kind of definition for critique. One well-known and awarded photographer said that if a piece is ok then it doesn’t get that much critique but rather praises. If piece is really good then it gets both positive feedback and ciritique. It’s easier to critique a good piece.
After hearing these words I realized that it’s possible to relate other way to critique. I can either think that I’ve failed if I’m being criticized or think that the more critique I’ll get the better the thing I’m doing. I have succeeded in igniting emotions in other thus negative. I’m getting some feedback of my work thus it’s not said in constructive way.
It’s marvelous to hear positive feedback and everyone of us needs it. However negative feedback is the fuel on the fire. Through critique we can develop ourselves and show to others that no matter what they say, we can express ourselves and are capable of making our dreams come true.
The next time someone criticizes me I think: “Damn, I’m doing such a good thing!”
With love, Anu-Maarit